How, When and IF to question...
A friend wrote to me this morning upset with a decision a parent had made - thinking it was a major mistake. I've wondered about that before, as well. What do you do if you think your parent(s) are making mistakes or bad decisions? Should you say anything? I think it depends on the situation.
If it's a situation where your parents haven't had access to some vital research, you could say, "You know, about_____, you should probably know...." If it's a situation where you just don't like what they're doing, well...you have to decide if it's worth bringing up. As parents, they have been making adult decisions for a long time without our input. ;) However, if it's a situation where you think they are making a horrible life decision, it may be worth speaking up, but only if you're willing to accept the risk of possibly putting a "wall" between you in your relationship. It's difficult to realize you are questioning your parents' judgment because they have always been the adults and know what's right or wrong. When you're an adult yourself, it puts you in an awkward position because you begin to see your parents not necessarily as "parents" but more as fellow adults who happen to be your parents.
I don't know. I guess, in my friend's situation, I'd try to respectfully accept the life decision my parent had made and just be there as support in case it didn't work out. I don't there is any other good option.
2 comments:
I think you put it well, Gidget.
My parents are getting quite old, and I've faced a few situations like this already, although not over real important issues.
Just gotta decide if it's important enough to do something about, or not. If it is, do something. If not, respect their decision and move on.
Well, unfortunately, my dad didn't really give me a choice prior to making his decision and goin' through with it. Now that it's done, I've let him know that I don't agree with his decision, but as his son, I'm behind him, no matter what he does. It's tough, though...it's tough to be supportive of something you don't agree with. It's going to take a lot of getting used to, you know?
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