Confessions of a Coffee Addict

Okay, one more...

In my previous post I mentioned that I've been drinking six cups of coffee in the mornings. Prior to last week that wasn't the norm, but I've since decided that in order to reduce the amount of gourmet coffee drinks I've been charging to my account (and thus having payroll deducted), I simply must either bring coffee to work with me in a thermos, or make my own in the office & transfer it to a thermos. However, my office has a large 12- to 15-cup machine that only has marked measurements for full pots o' coffee. I started out making a whole pot, thinking others in the office would help partake in the consumption. It was not to be... I found myself drinking the bulk of it and thus the six-cup morning was born. An unfortunate side effect of a six-cup morning was utter ridiculousness. I'm not kidding. The office coordinator threatened to "cut me off" of my coffee supply because of it. LOL.

Scenario 1: I'm going through recruitment requests and seeing if departments have fulfilled their hiring needs (and can thus close the files) or if we need to update the file for additional staff. Recruitment requests expire after one year so one of my jobs is to contact a department to notify them of an expired plan. Being high on my six cups o' coffee, I start to jokingly use an Arnold Schwartz. accent to say "Your plan has expired. You must submit a new one if you want to live." I'm not actually saying it to anyone in particular, just entertaining myself, but you can see how this is being seen by coworkers.

Scenario 2: I had seen the GEICO commercial the previous night with the actor (who plays Mini-Me on the Austin Powers movies) assisting the customer with their accident story. The guy starts dancing and rapping "It's my birthday, got my hair done..." So I think it's funny and I'm recalling it the next day and go around the office mimicing the dance & rap. Yeah, I'd had six cups o' coffee prior to that, but what's wrong with good humor.. LOL

Some people have no humor left...sheesh. :) Now I hide my coffee in my thermos without disclosing how many cups it contains. It's a need-to-know situation, after all. muhahahahahahah!