A belated Valentine post...
I meant to post this last week but time has been finding ways to speed by without my notice lately....
I had been running behind schedule and ended up driving into work on February 13th. This wasn't a huge problem as I'd run short on some fabric for a quilt and needed to pick up some more. And, as I always do, I cram lots of errands into those days that I drive so I can stay home on the weekends and enjoy the peace and quiet. Given that, I had wandered into Wally world on a desperate search for cloth dye retardant (to minimize bleeding of dye onto other fabrics), which, of course, was a massive failure. I searched every fabric store and department store in town that I considered MIGHT have such a product. No dye retardant....I've decided it's a product shrouded in urban myth. I looked online for folk remedies (vinegar and salt added to wash water) but only found sites debunking those remedies. Oh well...I ended up washing the fabric in extremely hot water several times over, checking the water for discoloration. Hopefully it worked because I need to contrast a dark fabric with a light fabric in a quilt and I REALLY don't want the dark color to bleed. I'll run a test wash with the two fabric colors before actually sewing so that's a project under development.
Anyhow, I'm wandering through Wally world, checking on some items I was considering buying when I was approached by a young hispanic mother with a small child. She says "Sorry, no much english, please help" and hands me two cards. Upon looking down, I realized they were valentine cards intended for the boy to take to school for his valentine and his mother was unable to read them. I smiled at her and started reading. The first card was very cute and was very appropriate for the age range of the child. The second card was clever but was intended for an older girl. I pointed to the first card and handed them back to the mother and she was very grateful. I had seen the hesitancy in her facial expression and I wondered how many times she had been given the cold shoulder or how many people had been rude to her because of the language barrier. She apologized several additional times and walked away. In hindsight, I wish I had made a stumbling attempt to speak Spanish to her so that she understood I wasn't upset by her request for assistance. I don't know why, but it seems in situations where you desperately want to remember another language, all of the words suddenly disappear from your mind until you're left staring dumbly at another person. I truly hope I didn't make her feel awkward. I was impressed that she felt courageous enough to ask, even knowing she could be rebuffed. I also hope that seeing someone not of their culture so willing to help his mother, the child will remember the interaction as positive. As I left the store, my mind continued to replay that interaction and I couldn't help but wish that I could have remembered enough Spanish to translate the english for her.
I know there are people who believe that all residents of the United States should know and speak english as their first language. In theory, this is a great idea in order to be consistent in our signs, literature and etc. However, the world is full of diversity and a richness of culture. As the people of the world continue to interact and live as neighbors, I think it's arrogant to expect all people to know the "American" language. Yes, if they plan on living here, it would be very advisable to have a grasp of it, but I certainly don't expect anyone to give up their primary language just to please a majority. We have fought too hard to preserve our disappearing cultures to maintain a double standard in language requirements.
This interaction has remained in my mind as something to ponder over. A generally good judge of character, this young woman was someone I instantly knew was a gentle, friendly and caring person. You could see her goodness in her eyes and honest expression. She would be someone that I would be honored to call a friend.
4 comments:
I didn't know you could by fabric retardent. I also didn't know that you should wash quilt material before using it. Oops!
In your situation, I would have said, "Donde te los abondigas?" or in English, "Where are my meatballs?" One of the few phrases I remember off hand at any given time. Surely when she thanked you, you could have said, "de nada."
I believe that America should do business and teach our children only in English. I also don't think we should require people to speak it unless they want too nor pass a law to such affect. But it makes me cringe to know that we are teaching children in Spanish here in Iowa which will only hinder their ability to adapt to society in the future should they stay.
That was a nice good samiritan story.
She never actually thanked me...only apologized over and over. If she had thanked me, I know I would have automatically said "de nada". It was only after she had left that the words I needed came back to me. "Lo siento que no recuerdo las palabras in espanol" or..."I'm sorry I don't remember the words in spanish." I probably have the verb conjugation wrong after "que" since I know there are special grammer rules in those cases but oh well. :)
When I was a child, a high school girl who lived next door to me (in Pulaski) taught me how to say 1-10 in spanish. I thought it was so cool that there were other languages and I then knew a few words. I retained the knowledge of those few words until I took spanish in high school.
I disagree that learning other languages will hinder the abilities of children of immigrants to adapt to American society. Our children and the children of immigrant parents have to be the bridges between the many cultures in America. They will be the ones to unify America in a common cause using the tools of respect and acknowledgement of cultural richness and contributions.
I think we also have to consider what the definition of American society truly is. We don't have a national identity other than we are the products of hundreds of years of immigration as our ancestors fled persecution or sought a new way of life. We are such a melting pot of cultures and identities that to ignore what each culture has brought to our lives is, to me, reminiscent of colonization's assimilation policies. If I were to live in a country whose language was not my primary language, I would hope that their citizens would respect me enough to accept my use of english even as I endeavor to learn that nation's official language. Just my two cents. :)
I don't disagree with you. I think you misunderstood me. Learning other languages is great. Living in a foreign country and not speaking their language isn't very good nor beneficial for either the host country or the immigrant. That is why all our ancestors learned English. That is why I am learning Tagalog. The only problem I have is when no attempt it made here in America to teach immigrants English and instead they are taught solely in their native tongue. They grow up forced to live in their small community because they can't understand what the world around them is speaking.
By the way, your Spanish skills are well beyond mine!
Oh, you're right. I did misunderstand you. I didn't know there were areas in which non-english speakers were only being taught in their native languages! I can see if they were newly arrived but they should immediately start learning how to interact with english-speakers by getting english lessons!
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