Troubled thoughts...

It's troubling when a friend is having marital problems and there's nothing that I can do to help. I can only be here to listen when she needs to talk, to offer supportive comments when she begins to doubt her decisions, to boost her up when she cries and says she's a failure. I know this is what she needs but it still makes me feel helpless because I want to do more, to take away some of the hurt. As time passes and all her efforts to save her marriage are met with resistance and are deliberately dismissed by her spouse, I see her happiness turning to bitter disappointment. She's better off without him, but I can't tell her that. I can't tell her that I don't see it changing, no matter what actions she takes to make her relationship better. I can't tell her that I see her misery stretching into the future until she no longer has any self-esteem, dignity, pride nor the ability to gather the strength to leave him. She makes sacrifices for her family and is rewarded with name-calling and being told that it isn't enough, that she and their son aren't enough. I have told her is that this isn't the life that I wanted for her. I hoped she would have so much more than this. I have said that the man her spouse has become isn't the same person that she married. The person he is now isn't the kind of person that their son needs as a role model. No child needs to hear his father say to his mother "fuck you bitch".

It makes me want to cry with her.

Addendum: They're trying to work it out. With all that's been said and done, I have to wonder how they'll make it, but I will allow for the possibility that everything will work out in the end. I have to believe it's possible...if only for the sake of my friend.