Ode to Peppermint-Mocha goodness
So I've become very addicted to Coffee-mate creamers lately. As any good addiction has proven though, the ability to indulge in the addiction is at the whim of the manufacturer. Nestle is on my shit list. :) Over the summer I was quite a fan of the Coconut Creme flavor, but it was either only a limited edition or a summer flavor. Not realizing this, I only bought canisters as needed until I realized that there were no more to be found. I was devastated and lost in my world of coconut-creme deprivation. Since then I've discovered Peppermint-Mocha creamer and let me tell you, it's become a scarce commodity! Over the past week I realized that the two canisters I had initially purchased wouldn't last for the duration of winter and so I scoured the area for more....only to find emptiness on the shelf. Noooooo! I couldn't face the loss and so searched high and low among the larger city stores, searching for my minty flavor creamer. Nothing at Super Walmart -- all sold out, damn them (don't they know they are my last resort??). Nothing at my local HyVee -- all sold out. Finally, I hit paydirt! The HyVee chain in a larger city had about eight canisters left on their holiday display. Torn, I wanted to sweep them all into my basket for a long-lasting winter treat, but felt guilty for depriving some other addicted comrade in coffee-creamer lust. So, I only grabbed three canisters.
It hurt to be so restrained.
Then I discovered more in the coffee aisle. Yes!! But, again, there weren't that many and so I only grabbed one more. This meant that I have five canisters of powder and one mega-jug of liquid gold flavor. Would this be enough? I don't know. So, when local supply fails, I turn to the internet.
To my sorrow, there is not an available merchant online to feed my addiction. What I can find on the shelf at the stores is it. I suppose I'll deal with it but I was rather relieved to know that I'm not the only addict out there ready to picket Nestle for year-round minty goodness. I found numerous blog posts about the tastiness of Peppermint-Mocha, of which I am posting one for your benefit. It is hysterically funny!
___________________________________
From blogger Polyester Bride...
To whom it may concern:
Why, oh why, do you insist on taunting me with your holiday-season-only sales of your peppermint mocha creamer? You know that I am your bitch when it comes to this tasty substance, that I will travel to twenty grocery stores just to find even one lone bottle so that I can turn my coffee from black and boring into CREAMY MINTY DELICIOUSNESS. If you sold this marvelous concoction throughout the year, you would make enough money off of me that you would eventually change the name of your Peppermint Mocha Creamer to The Whitters Blend Creamer. YOU KNOW THIS.
And yet...you insist on only selling this, this heaven-in-a-bottle only a few short months out of the year. This, my dear friends at Coffee-Mate, is nothing short of torture. Why do you do this to me? Don't you care about me? What prompted this decision, anyway? Did your market research show that consumers only crave peppermint-flavored coffee creamer from November through February? Is there something physically wrong with me that I want pepperminty coffee ALL YEAR LONG? Are you trying to tell me that I'm some sort of peppermint-mocha mutant? WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!?!
It's bad enough that Starbucks only sells its Mint Mocha Frappuccino bottles during the holiday season, or that Joe Muggs only offers its Peppermint Bark Mocha during those chilly wintry months. You, Coffee-Mate, were my last hope at ingesting a cup of coffee full of peppermint goodness...but even you, who I thought were my friend and ally, even you have deserted me. BASTARDS.
I know that I can't do anything to change your mind. Like any major corporation, you're going to go full-speed ahead with your company plans, not caring that there are those of us in the world who like peppermint coffee not just at Christmastime but ALL YEAR LONG. I only wish that I could make you see things from my perspective...that you could look upon a peppermint-creamer-less world through my eyes, and feel the overwhelming sorrow and pain that I feel as I face ten months without my minty coffee.
And then, and only then, would you understand.
Sincerely suffering peppermint withdrawals, Whitters
It hurt to be so restrained.
Then I discovered more in the coffee aisle. Yes!! But, again, there weren't that many and so I only grabbed one more. This meant that I have five canisters of powder and one mega-jug of liquid gold flavor. Would this be enough? I don't know. So, when local supply fails, I turn to the internet.
To my sorrow, there is not an available merchant online to feed my addiction. What I can find on the shelf at the stores is it. I suppose I'll deal with it but I was rather relieved to know that I'm not the only addict out there ready to picket Nestle for year-round minty goodness. I found numerous blog posts about the tastiness of Peppermint-Mocha, of which I am posting one for your benefit. It is hysterically funny!
___________________________________
From blogger Polyester Bride...
To whom it may concern:
Why, oh why, do you insist on taunting me with your holiday-season-only sales of your peppermint mocha creamer? You know that I am your bitch when it comes to this tasty substance, that I will travel to twenty grocery stores just to find even one lone bottle so that I can turn my coffee from black and boring into CREAMY MINTY DELICIOUSNESS. If you sold this marvelous concoction throughout the year, you would make enough money off of me that you would eventually change the name of your Peppermint Mocha Creamer to The Whitters Blend Creamer. YOU KNOW THIS.
And yet...you insist on only selling this, this heaven-in-a-bottle only a few short months out of the year. This, my dear friends at Coffee-Mate, is nothing short of torture. Why do you do this to me? Don't you care about me? What prompted this decision, anyway? Did your market research show that consumers only crave peppermint-flavored coffee creamer from November through February? Is there something physically wrong with me that I want pepperminty coffee ALL YEAR LONG? Are you trying to tell me that I'm some sort of peppermint-mocha mutant? WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!?!
It's bad enough that Starbucks only sells its Mint Mocha Frappuccino bottles during the holiday season, or that Joe Muggs only offers its Peppermint Bark Mocha during those chilly wintry months. You, Coffee-Mate, were my last hope at ingesting a cup of coffee full of peppermint goodness...but even you, who I thought were my friend and ally, even you have deserted me. BASTARDS.
I know that I can't do anything to change your mind. Like any major corporation, you're going to go full-speed ahead with your company plans, not caring that there are those of us in the world who like peppermint coffee not just at Christmastime but ALL YEAR LONG. I only wish that I could make you see things from my perspective...that you could look upon a peppermint-creamer-less world through my eyes, and feel the overwhelming sorrow and pain that I feel as I face ten months without my minty coffee.
And then, and only then, would you understand.
Sincerely suffering peppermint withdrawals, Whitters
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